Dealing with your lender on your own when you're behind on your mortgage payments is like going to war against an opponent who has nuclear weapons and all you've got is a rusty pocket knife. Things aren't likely to go well for you.
Why is that? Your lender has a lot of resources, including loads of money and experienced attorneys working for them. But beyond that, some mortgage lenders and servicers have repeatedly shown a willingness to bend or break rules, laws, and standards of ethics in order to foreclose.